What actually happens
The joke is short. The answer deserves context.
Caffeine can make you feel more alert, but it does not speed alcohol out of your bloodstream. Time is doing the sobering, boringly and reliably. Coffee may hide how impaired you feel, which can make bad decisions feel freshly caffeinated.
How the myth got legs
Every sticky belief has an origin story.
Movies needed a quick fix, and coffee looked responsible enough to cast in the role. Biology refused the script.
Research directions
Where the evidence trail begins.
These labels describe the editorial research lanes behind this draft. They are not substitutes for linked primary citations or professional advice.
- 01Public health guidanceEditorial source category
- 02Alcohol metabolism researchEditorial source category
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